Weekly Juice Battle 5

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The holiday week has come and gone and with it brings another juice battle. Last week I stepped it back up and cranked out reviews of 9 new juices that will go head to head today for juice of the week honors.

Without further ado, let’s start the countdown!

#9 Vapor 4 Life WOW Vanilla Shake Nobacco

vanilla-nobacco

Coming in at dead last is WOW Vanilla Shake Nobacco from v4L. What can I say? This one was easy for be because this is now by far the worst juice I have ever tasted in my life. Not only was the flavor gross, but it was so bad it almost made me puke. I’ve had bad juices before but none that brought with them an almost immediate nausea sensation.

Here’s what G4L says about this monstrosity:

t’s not easy to find a vanilla e-juice with the true, rich sweetness and complexity of real vanilla, but our V4L Vanilla Nobacco Juice has it all! A luxurious electronic cigarette liquid that produces wonderful volumes of sweet, vanilla flavored vapor. It’s an e-juice that manages to be both mild and intense, both rich and light—just like real vanilla! Our exclusive V4L formula is the only e-liquid out there that does justice to this classic favorite. View more electronic cigarette vapor juice flavors…

WOW is right. WOW this is the worst fucking juice ever. WOW. There were so many things wrong with this I don’t even know where to start. It sort of tasted like a shake, except it had a rancidness to it that is inexplicable. It for some reason had menthol which made it even more disgusting.  It barely has a even a trace of vanilla. I would say it is almost the exact opposite of the description.  The taste was so bad that it is pointless delving into the throat hit or vapor.

This one was a complete and utter waste, and not only that, I think I died a little inside after trying it. I would wish this one on my worst enemy. Stay far away if you know what you’re doing.

Read the full review

#8 Mt. Baker Vapor Ginger Ale

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This was an easy choice for #8 in this week’s countdown. In fact, it would very likely have been dead last if it hadn’t been featured on the same week as the worst juice I have ever tried.

So you’d think it would probably be pretty hard to fuck up a traditional, classic favorite like Ginger Ale, right? Well MBV managed to completely blow it with this one. There were two main things that really made this a bad juice.

First – it doesn’t really taste like ginger ale at all. To me, it tastes like a shitty lemon-lime soda flavor. No real trace of Ginger. Now if I’m ordering Ginger Ale, I don’t expect it to taste like Sprite. If I did, I would just order Sprite. The key differentiating factor is the Ginger, for which the beverage/e-juice is named, and in MBV’s Ginger Ale, I barely pick up a trace of it at all. So if you’re expecting this to taste like a frosty glass of Schwepp’s, you are going to be sorely disappointed because they totally missed the mark on this one.

Second – it literally has no throat hit at all. I’ve got this in a respectable 50/50 blend at 18mg. With almost any juice, you should get at least SOME type of hit at that configuration, but this juice is 100% throathitless. In fact, this speaks to a much larger problem, and why I really don’t like MBV that much – many of their juices are throathitless like this, and if you order any juice you haven’t tried from there before, you are taking a chance every time that you might get a throathitless juice that is going to be utterly worthless.

This one was a no brainer. It didn’t taste like Ginger Ale, and had absolutely no balls. Definitely do not buy.

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#7 Good Life Vapor: Razzled

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Coming in at #7 this week is Razzled by Good Life Vapor. Here’s what they say about it:

Hey dum dum, you know you like blue raspberry candy! Add menthol to get the flavor previously known as “Crystal Blue Persuasion”

Since I started vaping, I have tried a handful of raspberry flavored vapes, and I have yet to find one that I would ever want to vape again. Unfortunately Razzled didn’t do much of anything for me either. To me, it tasted strongly artificial. Now they say in the review that it is supposed to mimic a blue raspberry candy, so I can understand the need for a little artificialness, since there’s nothing more artificial than blue raspberry candy. That said, this goes way over the top. To me, it is bordering on a medicinal taste.  I quit smoking so that I wouldn’t have to use as much Robitussin, so I sure as hell don’t want to vape it.

Additionally, I really didn’t get a blue raspberry feel to it. This one actually tasted a lot more red to me. I love the taste of blue raspberry anything and I can say pretty definitively that this was not a good representation of what blue raspberry is supposed to taste like.

So overall this one was a pretty big fail. The plus is that beyond the flavor, it does hit good and produce a nice plume. Still, unless you are some kind of raspberry zealot, I would advise not messing with this one.

Read the full review

#6 ECBlends Banana Split

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This week ECBlends fell to #6 with their Banana Split customizable juice.  Here’s what they say about it:

Banana Split – Starting with ECBlend’s Banana Split recipe using our creamy Banana (dominant flavor), Chocolate, and Vanilla blends, create your own Banana Split

Now you can have your Ice Cream and Vape it too!  Add Cool Hit™ to enjoy your split with a nice cooling sensation in each vape!

This one was mediocre flavor-wise for me. It wasn’t terrible like the previous 3 juices in this week’s countdown, but I didn’t think it was that great either. To me, it fell short of it’s description as a banana split vape. Flavor-wise, I thought it tasted a lot like a plain ‘ol Tootsie Roll. The two most prominent flavors are the chocolate and the banana and for whatever reason they seem to meld together to create that flavor, which I don’t particularly care for and is a far cry from a hot fudge covered banana on a banana split. So flavor wise, not only did it fall short of its description, it didn’t taste especially great in general.

Additionally, this one had a super weak throat hit. Disappointing after I really liked their Cuban Wafer a couple weeks ago and felt it hit pretty good. Weak throat hit is always going to cost a lot of points with me, and unfortunately this juice fell into that category.

I would basically recommend against this one, although you could maybe customize it to make it a little better, but I would get a small bottle if you’re going to attempt it.

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#5 Naturally-Extracted-Tobacco: 3-Crown

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Coming in at #5 this week is 3-Crown from NET. Here’s what they say about it:

Our flagship cigar e-liquid, 3-Crown is a full-flavored yet smooth, medium-bodied tobacco vape made from a cigar using an aged Dominican tobacco filler wrapped in an Ecuadorian tobacco leaf.

This might be the lowest I have rated a NET juice so far. This one was really tough for me. The crazy thing about this juice is the taste is amazing. If you like really natural tasting tobacco vapes, this is seriously about as good as it gets. In fact, I think the taste of this one made with Ecuadorian tobacco rivals some of their other top juices that have won big in previous juice battles. It just tastes so clear and perfect, it is really amazing.

The biggest problem I have with this one is the poor throat hit. Very unfortunate to have such a great tasting juice have such a poor throat hit. In fact, if I hadn’t had 2 other poor throat hit juices this week, 3 Crown sadly might have been rated even lower for that reason.

I would really love to highly recommend this juice and even order another fat bottle for myself, but I can’t in good conscience recommend a juice that doesn’t hit good, and sadly this one really does not hit good.

Read the full review

#4 Virgin Vapor Organic Turkish Dark Roast Coffee

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Coming in at #4 this week is Turkish Dark Roast from Virgin Vapor. Here’s what they say about it:

This is the taste of super dark roast coffee at it’s most concentrated!  Rocket fuel!

Finally we are turning the corner this week and getting down to some nice juices. I had sadly written Virgin Vapor off quite a while ago – as I had tried a few of their juices in my vaping infancy and didn’t really care for them. I still had this pristine bottle of Organic Turkish Dark Roast sitting pristine and ready to vape, and decided to give it a whirl this week.

I was wowed by the clarity of the flavor. It really tastes of pure, clean, strong black coffee. Not shitty coffee either, but a good strong dark roast coffee. The kind that a real coffee connoisseur would appreciate.  No cream, no sugar, no bullshit. Just pure, delicious coffee.

I haven’t tried a ton of coffee vapes so far, but this is absolutely the best one I have tried yet. They nailed the flavor spot on.

The only area I would dock them a little is a slightly weak throat hit. Now I only got this at medium nic and 100% VG, so this isn’t nearly as bad as several other juices in the countdown that really had shitty throat hits, but I would have loved a stronger kick out of this one.

I think if I were going to order this one again, I would probably add some PG, and get it at a higher nic level. It would make it a perfect early morning eye-opener, just like a true cup of coffee.

Definitely a good vape, worth a try if you’re into coffee. As long as you know that this is a pure black coffee and not a frilly caramel mocha latte, you will be glad you tried it.

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#3 Night Light Vapor – Gold

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Coming in 3rd place this week is Gold from NLV. This one came out of left field and I had never even heard of the company before, but it was a real pleasant surprise. Here’s what they say about it:

Another BEST Seller that is giving Bounty Hunter a run for the money.

Review by Carlton, a member of ECF (Electronic Cigarette Forum)

NLV Gold – It has a dark, maybe toasted, tobacco flavor. It reminds me of something I can’t quite place, maybe a Swisher Sweet or a cigarillo? It’s been a long while since I smoked one of those, so it’s difficult to recall. On the inhale it has a bit of sweetness, but on the exhale is where it really shines. I think someone else said it was a robust flavor. I agree. Robust in so far that it’s a full mouth flavor. All of your tongue gets used as the vapor passes by. But it’s not overpowering or heavy handed, just smooth. It’s fantastic and I foresee mini-jug purchases in my future.

This is an all around good juice. It’s a synthetic tobacco vape, and as such is related to other synthetic tobacco vapes you have likely tried, to some degree. I get a very light tobacco flavor from it mixed with a sweet light brown richness. Maybe a little graham cracker or caramel. There is a definite sweetness to it, but it’s not overpowering. I think it has a more rich and dark finish – I have gotten coffee notes on the exhale.

It kicks like a mule (I have it at 24mg) and it produces crazy vapor. I’ve been vaping this one pretty steadily all week and it is a very solid juice. It definitely makes me curious to try some of their other offerings because this one was VERY good.

I would highly recommend it to just about anyone. It has a very universal flavor that a lot of people would probably find appealing.

Read the full review

#2 Moon Mountain Vapor: Moon Rock Madness

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Battling all the way back from worst with their Dark Side Delirium a couple weeks ago to second place this week is Moon Mountain Vapor with Moon Rock Madness. Here’s what they say about it:

You can’t really tell by looking at pictures and videos of moon rocks, but they are not grey.  Moon Rocks are really full of color.  Trouble is, you can’t tell what color it is because it’s always changing!  Oh look it’s orange, no wait, it’s green, no wait, it’s red, no……  Man, it’s enough to drive a Lunartic to madness I tell ya.  Well, more madness really, since being a Lunartic is a madness of it’s own.  All that color changing had my head spinning so fast I just decided to go with it, you know?  That means, vape inspiration!!!  Really, it reminded me of a bowl of my favorite breakfast fruity rounds.  Yeah, that’s right, it’s fruity rounds in a vape juice.  Hey, you know what’s in there.  There is orange flavor, green flavor, redflavor……..  Embrace the “Moon Rock Madness” you’ll be glad you did.

After Dark Side Delirium got its ass kicked in a previous juice battle, I wasn’t sure if MMV would have anything worthy of a top finish, but I was sure wrong. Moon Rock Madness is an excellent juice. It’s a sweet candy-like juice. If you have read many of my reviews, you know that super sweet candy flavors have a hard time getting a high rating from me, but this one was able to earn one. It is one of the best candy style vapes I have ever tried. I’ve been vaping it all week and I absolutely love it. I really agonized over putting MMV at #1 or #2 this week and it was an extremely close battle.

To me, I get a lot of different flavors from this – various shades of artificial fruity goodness. After vaping this all week, I finally figured out what it reminds me of – Fruit Stripe Gum. It tastes VERY similar to Fruit Stripe Gum. In a good way.

I took this out with me yesterday and both my friends that tried it really liked it and I got a request to bring the bottle back with me next time, so I know I’m not alone on this one. This juice is really good.

The one thing that kept it from beating out this week’s winner is it didn’t quite hit as well. It has a pretty solid throat hit for the nic level at 12 mg, but it just wasn’t quite as crisp. Had I got this at 18mg instead of 12 it might have been another story.

Either way, this is a great juice. It is super unique. It is fruity without being overly sweet and you can easily vape it all day long. It has LOTS of flavor and you will be pulling different notes from it as you go along.

Highly recommended, and I am pretty confident I will be buying this one again.

Read the full review

#1 Kali’s Coconut Burfi by Nirvana Vapor

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It was a tough contest this week with the top 3 contenders all being extremely close but I had to give the #1 spot to Kali’s Coconut Burfi by Nirvana Vapor. Here’ s what they say about it:

Kali’s Coconut Burfi: You haven’t tasted an e-liquid like this before! Burfis are a traditional Indian desert frequently made with coconut, spiced with cardamom and cinnamon! They are delicious and reminiscent of a macaroon. This e-juice brings the east to the west right to your cartomizer! Fill up a tank and indulge!

This was a great juice on so many levels. Great flavor. Great originality. Great throat hit. Great vapor. I have reviewed quite a few Nirvana juices now and while I liked all of them on some level, this one was a true home run.

So a Coconut Burfi is a traditional Indian dessert made primarily from coconut and cardamom. This juice is a near perfect representation. Not only that, but it’s a great idea for a juice. I am a strong believer that coconut is an ideal flavor for vaping, and mixing it with cardamom gives you a rich, subtly sweet and spicy vape that is something most likely completely different than what you’ve been used to vaping. This ain’t your grandma’s ejuice.

The super complex and interesting flavor comes through extremely crisp and clear with a powerful throat hit and thick plumes of vapor. Overall it is really a delight to vape. I would absolutely order this again in a big fat bottle. It’s a great change of pace and something that’s got some real character to it.

I can’t recommend this one enough. Step out of your comfort zone and take a chance on it and you will not be disappointed!

Read the full review

The Bottom Line

This long relaxing holiday week was a good one. I was able to crank out 9 juice reviews this week and the results were pretty black and white. Juices 5-10 were all pretty much worthy of avoiding, and juices 1-4 were all clearly worth a try. There weren’t any in the middle this week.

I was pretty surprised to have a NET get such low marks this time around, but I have been sadly finding that some of their juices do come up short in the throat hit department, which is unfortunate.

Weak throat hit seemed to be the theme of the week with NET, ECBlends and MBV all falling victim.

On the flip side, some really original juices wowed me this week and took the top 2 spots. It makes me really want to make a concerted effort to seek out more creative juice blends that are outside the norm of what we have grown accustomed to vaping.

Overall, it was a great week and I uncovered some real gems. This week promises to be just as exciting as I have a ton more blends on deck.

Stay tuned!

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